Discombobulations Blog #1 – Hannahlandia Through the Ages.

And now……. for some self-regarding nonsense…

**Before I start, this is my second stab at this…I thought it was originally quite good…okay not Jane Austen good, but it held its own…well allllllong comes “Capitan Sensible” with his masterpiece  and pissed all over my first blog bonfire….so here we go…

Let me introduce myself, my name is Hannah and I left my planet of Hannahlandia and arrived on Earth in 1980. Growing up in the small town of Emsworth I had an idyllic childhood filled with memories of ice-cream vans, going crabbing, attending Brownies and lots of other Famous Five worthy material. When I was 15 my family and I moved to Javea and I finished my schooling at XIC. After knocking around Javea for a few years working in kitchens and bars whilst having a stonkingly good time I met and had a son with my now ex-husband  (hey, you win some you lose some). I did the Mummy/ wife thing for some time and although very rewarding it was also very tedious so I’m not going to bore you with that. So, I’m now a nearly 37 year old with a 13 year old son and we cohabit with my partner Jason….partner sounds like we should run a law firm but boyfriend seems strange when you are over 15. Anyhoo,  I am not normal by any stretch of the imagination nor do I wish to be, as they say, I don’t suffer with insanity I enjoy every moment of it!!

So, that’s the history lesson done and dusted…do with it what you will….

How did I up being an admin??…..Well, I’ve always been a member of JC, I mean I cannot remember a day when I wasn’t, it’s as ingrained into my daily life as taking a….washing my hands…

I do the same every morning, I wake up, make sure I’m alive, all vital signs are good and the I check JC…. depending on what’s going on means the difference between getting to work on time or not (sorry boss).

I have a funny way of looking at things…the line between what I find funny and what is inappropriate is very fine I must admit and sometimes it’s gotten me into trouble…remember the blasphemy post folks?? Yeah, don’t we all….but I apologised, said some Hail Mary’s and all good right?! …..Oh, is that not how it works? Never mind then….

So…where was I?? Oh yes, how I became admin….well, I always interacted a lot within the group, funny photo here, useful info there…maybe a joke or two….an apology if I had crossed ‘the line’ but generally all good….Loraine took me for a drink one afternoon and got me very drunk…okay, I had 2 G&T’s….and asked me if I wanted to join forces with her and Trunchy…..(who’s blog Capitán Sensible also pissed all over with his ‘Montaillou’ length super blog I may hasten to add)…and of course I accepted!! The inauguration took place in September 2015 

The Ceremonial Banner 🙂

It is not all sweetness and light though…no, no,no…..let me get that very clear….first of all I had to pass the initiation procedure….for example, I had to show I could type and admin whilst doing my shopping in Mercadona on Saturday afternoon in the middle of August….I had to show I could find a thread about mouldy cheese purchased in más y más from sometime in April 2013…this was against the clock peeps…very difficult…and I had to look at thousands of dog photos for hours on end without smashing Alan (my laptop) into a thousand pieces and throwing him down the stairs. I passed this by the skin of my teeth, they should use this method to get terrorists to talk….I’ll email the Pentagon…

Initiation process passed I was a fully qualified member of the admin team ready to do battle on a day to day basis….I started as you would any new job…full of questions and self doubt…should I say something? Should I give a warning? Should I delete comment? Should I REMOVE the person?! That was the big one….yup…and I lost my MRV (member removal virginity) on 31st of October 2015….I remember that still…ahhhhhh …*drifts away into fond memories*

ANYWAY!! Here we are now!! I’m still here! I’ve not been arrested or shot and buried under the AP7….I’ve gained a lot of friends and also managed to piss off a lot of people…but that goes with the territory I suppose….why do people say that? The territory? Shouldn’t it be terrain? Goes with the terrain…territory…terrain….whatever. My favourite so far was the person I removed who then got hold of my telephone number and posted it alongside a photo of me on other groups advertising the fact I did sexual favours….yup…..I never got one phone call…not one….I don’t know if that makes me sad or happy….I mean I wouldn’t have done anything….but would have been nice to have been asked…give my ego a bit of a leg up you know what I mean?!

Soooo, (I say that a lot) I’d better wrap this up now or Loraine will think I’m trying to out do CS…(which I am of course…shhhh)…I’ve got loads of stuff from my discombobulated little world of Hannahlandia I want to share with you all so keep your ears and eyes out for my blogs….and remember, no matter where we originate from we are all fantastic in our own way, be kind to one another….Until next time , byeeeee!!!

I leave you with one of may favourite songs 🙂