This week I am meandering from  that green and pleasant land we know as the United (although now rather Untied) Kingdom.

Bearing in mind that I write this initially for the Olive Press, I had my knuckles rapped by my esteemed editor about my last column, as I had been told, most specifically, that I must keep my musings about the fun and games I have as admin of Javea Connect and  instead I went veering totally off course by lecturing about the “galavantings” of Columbus who is clearly not my editor’s favourite bloke. Although, I do have to say that, unlike my dear editor, at least Columbus used to ensure he had filled his ship up with enough diesel to actually get him to the Caribbean without having to call the grua…..twice!!

I have a feeling he may have edited that last paragraph out before going to print, but this is my blog so the truth will out!

Ok, so back to the subject of Javea Connect, where members love to post photos and have their little moan about life in and around their home-town. Nothing, it seems, is as satisfying as making sure other members know just how much dog poo has been left on the pavement  (sometimes even accompanied in full glorious technicolour and always properly photoshopped snaps of the offending canine gifts). Another really popular suject is how many plastic bottles were found on the beach and what a good idea it would be if the Mayor were to install a giant fish shaped receptacle so that people will all put their waste in that and the beach would be rubbish free. 

Who empties it? And where will it go?

The rubbish and doggy-doo discussions have been going on since Columbus lost his compass and there has never been a solution. This is not because of a lack of a giant wire fish shaped rubbish bin, it is because (some) people are just plain lazy, selfish and simply do not give a fig about their surroundings.

The squillion posts on these subjects over the last eight years have all been the “same meat with different gravy”, in other words, a post expressing anger at the way slovenly people leave their crap for others to clear up will be backed up by 50 or 60 more comments agreeing that something must be done. But seriously, is anyone actually going to put their name to a comment saying “ I am proud to say I leave my garbage, bottles, cans and dirty nappies chucked in a plastic bag as I am too slovenly to dispose of them responsibly.” Of course they won’t…. and so the one sided debate continues in a never ending circle and will do so until the Mayor actually responds to the tags, which will be never as  a) he does not read local group media and b) like most of us, he has no economical solution to combat bone idleness! 

There are other trigger subjects, such as campervans and, of course, those lycra clad peddle pushers… but I am not going down that cycle path now as my word-count is already looking like it may not fit in the ……………..feck, run out of space!!!

‘Til the next time…. Loraine